OVERDUE.

I suppose I’m far overdue in typing up yet another post. In ways I feel as if I’m left with a blank slate and nothing to write, but in other ways I feel as if thoughts are flowing through my mind at rapid rates. Maybe it’s just finding the words to express.

Much of my thinking over the last couple weeks has been focused upon relationships. This has been a result of much frustration in this area. During this huge transition in my life, I’ve stepped away from Taylor, where I’ve lived within incredible bonds for the past four years. Reflecting back on those years, I covet those times spent with others. They were friendships that changed and molded me. I lived with those I loved. I constantly surrounded myself with those I loved. So, now, I come here and am told to love those with whom I live. In all reality, I didn’t think that would be too difficult. I’m living with an incredible group of individuals who have taken this radical step in their lives. But, after a month, the lack of depth really hit me. The lack of intentionality. This is most likely due to the lack of time that we’ve had to dive into each others’ lives. Much of my frustration, though, is probably due to the fact that I’ve chosen to compare these relationships to those back home. Some of which have taken four years in the making. All of which, by now, I’ve romanticized. In the midst of this, though, I’ve come to realize how much focus I put on human friendships. I would never argue that human relationships aren’t God-honoring. But, could they reach beyond the boundaries? Could I be too people-focused? Do I choose to fill the absence of time spent seeking after God with time seeking after others? Maybe God is calling me into a season of learning what it means to cling to Him instead of others. Quite the paradigm shift.

I have been extremely encouraged by all that is happening at Church back home. Having left with a bit of a cynical heart towards NewLife, I also knew that change would come this year. And, it has now begun. Reading prayer after prayer on the blog has been so powerful. People are experiencing God in a new light! I wrote last week that I felt your week of 24-7 prayer would be one of waiting on God. And, I think you’ve seen that over the last week. People changing by just being still before God and longing to know him. Now that you’ve stepped into this second week, I pray that you would shift your focus even more towards LISTENING. I’m praying that God will speak in huge ways this week. I pray that He would mess up the human plans of NewLife and make them his own.

I suppose those are the thoughts in my head on this sunny Monday morning. Pray that I would be shaken up during my time here. (Whatever that means.) Pray that I would continue to learn more about myself, and that those things I learn would cause me to be drawn even nearer to Christ. Pray that I would have the desire and drive to pour my entire being into this time…that I would be changed…that I would be molded.

Much love from over here,
Aaron

QUESTIONS…Do we make prayer all about us? Could prayer possibly just be God’s words, given to us, and then spoken back to him?